Lovemaking tips for seniors

[Byrner]

1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)

4. Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner’s name on your hand in case you can’t remember.

6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don’t end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don’t even think about trying it twice.

[torres9]

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

911 ?

This is not the 51st State, byrner.

I know you've worked for war-mongering Americans for so long you're starting to sound like one.

Off-topic, did you hear about the guy who phoned the samaritans and was put through to a call centre in Pakistan. The caller said that he was suicidal, to which the good samaritan replied "Can you fly a plane?"

[shirl]

Lol,very funny :icon_cheesygrin:

[Byrner]

Hahahaha very good torres9